Dennis Miller’s Take on Israeli Palestinian Conflict… A Must Read

Defending the Tribe, Courtesy of flickr.com/people/astros/ texas mustang

I came across a rather large quote from comedian Dennis Miller, giving his take on the Palestinians’ claims against the United States and Israel. It is a must read. Unlike a lot of bloggers, I know when to get out of the way of someone else’s genius and to just let-errr- rip. So here goes (and btw, yes Dennis’s last name is Miller, and no, he is not Jewish)…

Here is acid-tongued, and always direct, comedian Dennis Miller’s take on the Israeli Palestinian conflict:

“The Palestinians want their own country. There’s just one thing about that: There are no Palestinians. It’s a made up word. Israel was called Palestine for two thousand years. Like ‘Wiccan,’ ‘Palestinian’ sounds ancient but is really a
modern invention. Before the Israelis won the land in the 1967 war, Gaza was Owned by Egypt , the West Bank was owned by Jordan, and there were no Palestinians.’

As soon as the Jews took over and started growing oranges as big as basketballs, what do you know, say hello to the ‘Palestinians,’ weeping for their deep bond with their
lost ‘land’ and ‘nation.’

So for the sake of honesty, let’s not use the word ‘Palestinian’ any more to describe these delightful folks, who dance for joy at deaths until someone points out they’re being taped. Instead, let’s call them what they are: ‘Other Arabs Who Can’t Accomplish Anything In Life And Would Rather Wrap Themselves In
The Seductive Melodrama Of Eternal Struggle And Death.’ I know that’s a bit unwieldy to expect to see on CNN. How about this, then:

‘Adjacent Jew-Haters.’ Okay, so the Adjacent Jew-Haters want their own country. Oops, just one more thing: No, they
don’t. They could’ve had their own country. Anytime in the last
thirty years, especially several years ago at Camp David . But If you have your own country, you have to have traffic lights and garbage trucks. And Chambers of Commerce, and, worse, you actually have to figure out some way to make a living.

That’s no fun. No, they want what all the other Jew-Haters in the region want: Israel . They also want a big pile of dead Jews, of course that’s where the Real fun is — but mostly they want Israel.

Why? For one thing, trying to destroy Israel – or ‘The Zionist Entity’ as their Textbooks call it — for the last fifty years has allowed the rulers of Arab Countries to divert the attention of their own people away from the fact that they’re the blue-ribbon most illiterate, poorest, and tribally backward on God’s Earth, and if you’ve ever been around God’s Earth, you know that’s
really saying something.

It makes me roll my eyes every time one of our pundits waxes poetic about the great history and culture of the Muslim Mid east. Unless I’m missing something, the Arabs haven’t given anything to the world since Algebra, and, by the way, thanks a hell of a lot for that one.

Chew this around and spit it out: 500 million Arabs; 5 Million Jews. Think of all the Arab countries as a football field, and Israel as a pack of matches sitting in the middle
of it. And now these same folks swear that if Israel gives them half of that pack of matches, everyone will be pals..

Really? Wow, what neat news. Hey, but what about the string of wars to obliterate the tiny country and the constant din of rabid blood oaths to drive very Jew into the sea? Oh, that? We were just kidding.

My friend, Kevin Rooney, made a gorgeous point the other day: Just reverse the Numbers. Imagine 500 million Jews and 5 million Arabs. I was stunned at the simple brilliance of it. Can anyone picture the Jews strapping belts of razor blades and dynamite to themselves? Of course not.

Or marshaling every fiber and force at their disposal for generations to drive a tiny Arab State into the sea? Nonsense.

Or dancing for joy at the murder of innocents? Impossible.
Or spreading and believing horrible lies about the Arabs baking their bread with the blood of children? Disgusting. No, as you know, left to themselves in a world of peace, the worst Jews would ever do to people is debate them to death.

However, in any big-picture strategy, there’s always a danger of losing moral weight. We’ve already lost some. After September 11th our president told us and the world he was going to root out all terrorists and the countries that supported
them.

Beautiful. Then the Israelis, after months and months of having the equivalent of an Oklahoma City every week (and then every day) start to do the same thing we did, and WE
tell them to show restraint.

If America were being attacked with an Oklahoma City every day, we would all very shortly be screaming for the administration to just be done with it and kill everything south of the Mediterranean and east of the Jordan.“